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I miss my Mava

I am Sneha. I am from Mysore, Karnataka. I am a primary school teacher. I am married and I have two children. My hubby Mahesh is an IT engineer. We have been married for ten years.

My hubby and I had a wonderful relationship from the beginning of our marriage. There was good energy between us. Both of us were attracted to each other. Even though we lived in his parents’ house, we used every opportunity we got to get intimate. It was better when his parents were not around because we would have the entire house to ourselves. If his parents went to meet relatives, go shopping or just for a walk, we would get intimate in any part of the house. My hubby would make sure the main door of the house is latched and come looking for me. We have had sex in the kitchen, bathroom, living room and the dining room. I became addicted to having sex with him. After one and half years I conceived and gave birth to my son.

Pregnancy changed my body. I became a little large and curvier. Even though my breasts and bottom had become big, I didn’t look fat because I am 5 feet 5 inches. My hubby liked the way my body had changed. He said I looked sexier. We had more passionate sex. A few months later I conceived again and gave birth to my daughter. My body changed again. My breasts became bigger and I put on more weight. But for some reason, I was putting on weight mostly on my bottom.

My hubby liked the way I looked even after my second delivery but it was at this time, he got an opportunity to work in the US for one year through his company. I didn’t want him to go but he told me it would help his career and for one year he would be paid five times more than the amount he was getting paid. My parents also told me it was just for a year and the benefits were more. So, I agreed.

After my hubby went to the US, I started to really miss him. At that time, I was not employed and I was stuck in the house with two little children, and two old people. My Atthe (mother-in-law) had constant back ache and sometimes head ache. She was resting most of the time, while I took care of the children and did the housework. My Mava (father-in-law) looked healthy but he had dementia. He had very poor memory. We would lock the main gate of the house, fearing he would walk out and never come back. Every night after dinner, my Atthe or I would help my Mava find their bedroom because he didn’t remember the way to their bedroom. It was not easy to take care of them and take care of my children but I didn’t mind. It was more difficult to control my sexual desires without my hubby. I missed him. My body ached for him. Whenever he called, I would tell him how much I missed him physically. One time he suggested, we can have a video chat and masturbate together. I agreed to try it. We tried it after a few days and we both liked it, so we decided to do it once a week. I liked it, but it was not like having sex with him.

Somehow five months had passed. The children were growing faster and parents-in-laws were growing older. My Atthe complained of more body aches. My Mava’s dementia was getting worse. He had started calling me and my Atthe by names of his daughters or sisters. Sometimes he would call my Atthe by my name, Sneha. And, he would call me by my Atthe’s name, Jaya. I was not surprised because the doctor had told me Mava’s dementia had become worse. But I was shocked one night. My Atthe and Mava had finished dinner. My Atthe told me she was tired and asked me to guide my Mava to the bedroom. After my Atthe went to their bedroom, I washed the dishes in the kitchen before going to the living room. I told my Mava it was time to sleep. He stood up but he didn’t know which way to go. I held his arm and walked with him to their bedroom. He turned to me and said, “Jaya, let’s make love to night.”

I was shocked but knowing he had Dementia’s, I just said, “Mava, I am not Atthe. I am Sneha, your Sose”. (Sose=daughter-in-law)

“What is wrong with you? What do you mean Sose?” he asked and said, “Our son is only ten years old.”

I didn’t know what to say. I was confused.

“Jaya! Jaya! Say something,” he said loudly.

I heard my Atthe’s voice from their bedroom. “What happened? What happened?” She sounded concerned for him.

I quickly went to their bedroom. I opened the door and said, “Nothing Atthe. Mava has forgotten my name. He is calling me Jaya.”

“Ayao, that man has lost all memory,” Atthe said.

“Jaya, who are you talking to?” Mava asked and came towards me.

I caught his arm and used a little force to drag him inside the room. I helped him reach the bed. My Atthe told him to lie down and go to sleep. Looking confused, he sat on the bed. After he laid down on the bed, I told them ‘Good night’ and left their bedroom.

From that day, my Mava started calling me Jaya and he always looked confused around my Atthe. It didn’t bother me but one night after they had dinner, my Atthe asked me to help my Mava reach their room. I washed the dishes before going to the living room. I asked my Mava to stand up. He stood up. I held his arm and guided him. Half the way to their room, he stopped walking and slowly turned to face me. He looked at me and said, “Jaya!”

“It’s time to sleep Mava,” I said and tried to turn him around but he resisted and he suddenly hugged me. I was shocked. I tried to free myself from his tight hug but he was strong. Even more shockingly, he tried to kiss me. I tried moving my head away from him but he managed to kiss my forehead, my cheeks and my neck. I tried to push him away. He hugged me even more strongly and managed to kiss my lips. I thought about shouting and calling my Atthe. I realised I shouldn’t shock her. I moved my head back, stopping him from kissing my lips. His hands moved down and caught my bottom. He squeezed my bottom and tried to kiss my lips again. I pushed him and freed myself from his grasp. I quickly went to their bedroom and opened the door. He followed me to their bedroom. I went inside the room. My Atthe was lying on the bed and she was awake. My Mava entered the room and saw Atthe. He looked confused again and went to the bed. I told them ‘Good night’ and left the room feeling disturbed.

After that incident I was always on alert with my Mava. I started to take him to their bedroom before my Atthe went to their bedroom. Even then, he tried to hug me twice. My Atthe saw him trying to hug me and pulled him away. His memory loss was getting worse.

Two more months passed. I had left my son with my parents because he liked to play with my elder brother’s son, who lived with my parents. I was still breast feeding my daughter so I kept her with me.

One evening, after dinner my Atthe and Mava went to their bedroom. I washed the dishes and went to my bedroom. I checked my daughter. She was sleeping. My hubby had told me he would video call me at 9:30pm to masturbate together on video call.  So, I had a shower in the attached bathroom. After the shower, I came out of the bathroom and started wearing my clothes. I didn’t wear panties and bra, just to be ready for masturbation when my hubby called. I wore my petticoat and a cream colour, full sleeve, Lycra stretch blouse which matched the light blue Saree that had cream coloured, small square patterns on it. It was one of my hubby’s favourite Sarees, so I had selected it.

I was ready by 9:00pm but just a minute after I got ready my daughter started crying. I took her from her cradle. I carried her and sat on the edge of the bed. I lifted my blouse and breastfed her. After a few minutes my mobile rang. I picked up my mobile from the bedside table. It was my hubby’s call. I answered the call, “Hello.”

He said, “Hello darling. I can’t call you at 9:30 today. I will call you at 11:00. Is it okay?”

“It’s okay Mahesh,” I said.

“Okay. I’ll call you later,” he said and hung up.

I was a little disappointed. I looked down at my daughter. She had gone to sleep. I carefully stood up, holding her. I kept her back in her cradle. I was tucking the sheets when I heard my Mava’s voice. “Jaya!”

Surprised, I turned around and looked towards the door. I saw my Mava standing there and smiling. Before I could react, he turned around and closed the door. I went towards him to take him back to his bedroom. By the time I could reach him, he turned around and said, “Jaya, let’s make love.”

I wanted to tell him I am not Jaya, I am Sneha. But he quickly lifted a hand and grabbed my left breast. That’s when I realised, I had not covered my breast after feeding my daughter.

“Jaya, your breasts are so big and beautiful,” he said and squeezed my breast.

I was confused because I felt good. I stood there frozen.

He took me in his arms and kissed my lips. His hands moved behind me and touched my bottom. He caressed and squeezed my bottom. One of his hands let go of my bottom and touched my bare breast again. He squeezed my breast. His tongue was inside my mouth. I didn’t know what to do. I felt too weak to resist. When he stopped kissing, I felt disappointed but he said, “Jaya, let’s make love.”

I didn’t want to tell him, I am Sneha. I wanted to be Jaya for once.

He let go of me and moved back. He started removing his clothes. When he removed his underwear, I saw his hard penis. It was like my hubby’s penis. It just made me feel weaker. He was completely naked. He didn’t look bad for his age.

“Jaya, lie down on the bed,” he said.

I held my Saree above my knees and got on top of the bed. I laid down on my back. I bent my knees and spread my legs.

My Mava got on top of the bed. He knelt down on the bed, between my legs. He put his right hand forward and touched my inner thighs.

“Jaya, your skin is soft and smooth, like a baby,” he said.

That’s what my husband used to say, so I smiled and closed my eyes. I felt his finger rubbing my clit. I was little worried that he may have forgotten how to have sexual intercourse. But when I felt his thick finger penetrate my vagina, I was little hopeful.

First, he inserted one finger inside my vagina. Then I could feel two thick fingers inside me, scooping out my vaginal fluid. He pulled out his fingers, leaving me a little disappointed. I opened my eyes, wondering what he was trying to do. I saw him licking my vaginal fluid from his fingers. He looked happy.

He bent down between my inner thighs. His mouth covered my vagina and his tongue penetrated my vagina. He licked the inside of my vagina. It was so relaxing, I closed my eyes and prepared to let him do whatever he wanted to do to me.

I put my hands forward and touched the back of his head. I gently pressed it down on my vagina. His lips pressed on my vagina and his tongue pushed deeper inside me. He sucked passionately like a sexually deprived man. I felt sorry for him.

I could understand him because I had not had sex for seven months. So, when he stopped sucking my vagina, and moved on top of me, I wanted to satisfy him.

When I felt his penis on my vagina, I felt little guilty. I looked at the wall clock. It was only 9:30pm. My hubby and I were supposed to masturbate at that time but he had changed his mind and decided to call me at 11pm. I didn’t have the patience to wait till 11pm that night.

My Mava was struggling to find the opening of my vagina with his penis. I put my hand forward and grabbed his penis. I moved it till I felt the tip of his penis in the slit of my vagina. He pushed and I felt his penis inside me. For the first time in seven months, I felt alive again. His hard penis felt just like my hubby’s penis inside me. He moved his head down and sucked my breast. He moved his hip back slowly pulling his penis out, and pushed it inside me. I felt like a woman after a long time.

He sucked my nipple and swallowed my milk. He moved his hip, pulling and pushing his penis inside my vagina. After a few minutes he let go of my breasts. He kissed my lips and moved his penis in and out my vagina faster. It felt so good. Every time he pulled his penis out and pushed back inside, it felt like the first time. I regretted not letting him have sex with me when he wanted. But I was happy for finally letting my Mava have sex with me.

My Mava repeatedly penetrated me, desperate to ejaculate.  And I lay on my back enjoying the sensation of my body tingling and my head about to erupt with joy. I was surprised by his ability to repeatedly penetrate me with so much energy despite his age. I felt like an electric current was running directly through my vagina. A humming sensation pulsed through my stomach, chest and thighs. As he penetrated me faster and harder, the energy centres of my body felt activated at once and I felt an intense tension simultaneously in my brain, my limbs and my whole body. Finally, the sensation reached its highest point with a full release of tension, stress and pain. My Mava slowed down and I felt his penis pulsating and jerking inside my vagina. I realized he was ejaculating inside me and I feared for a moment that I might get pregnant, but I quickly remembered I was in my safe period. I relaxed and let him lie down on me while he ejaculated inside me.

After he finished, he rolled over and laid down next to me breathing heavily.

I stood up and tidied my clothes. I helped him get up and put on his clothes. When he was ready, I took him to their bedroom. My Atthe was still sleeping. He sat down on the bed and laid down. I left their room. I went to my bedroom and sat down on the bed. I couldn’t believe what had just happened. I had just had sex with my Mava and enjoyed it.

At 10:45pm I went to the bathroom. I washed and dried my vagina. I came out of the bathroom and set up my laptop on the bed. I waited for my hubby to call. He called at 11:05pm. We masturbated. I felt guilty for having sex with my hubby’s father but that night I slept with satisfaction.

Next day, my Mava didn’t look like he remembered anything. And, I started taking birth control tablets hoping to have sex with him again.

That week, every day after they finished dinner, I took him to their bedroom. He didn’t try to hug me or kiss me. I assumed he was physically satisfied. But the week after that, he started again. He called me Jaya and tried hugging me, and kissing me. I also wanted to have sex but I wanted to do it patiently next time so I thought of a plan. My Atthe was due for medical check-up that week. I called her daughter who lived in the same city and asked her to take her mother for a medical check-up on Wednesday. She agreed to do it.

On Wednesday before my Attige (sister-in-law) came home, I took bath and wore clean clothes and a good Saree. Attige came home at 10am. My Atthe (mother-in-law) was ready, so they left home within 15 minutes.

I locked the doors carefully and went to the living room. My Mava was watching TV. I touched his arm. He looked up at me. I helped him stand. I guided him to walk towards my bedroom. Half way to the room, he stopped walking and said, “Jaya, let’s make love.”

“Okay Mava, let’s go to the bedroom,” I said and guided him to my bedroom.

I removed my Mava’s clothes and helped him lie down on the bed. I removed my blouse, bra, and my panties. I got on top of the bed. His penis was not fully erect. I sucked it for a few minutes and made it hard. I knelt on top with my legs out to either side of him. He touched my breasts and squeezed them. I sat up straight and held his penis. I inserted the tip of his penis inside my vagina and I lowered myself down, allowing his penis to penetrate fully inside me. It felt very good to have sex with him again. I leaned forward to let him suck my breast. He sucked my nipples and drank my milk, hastily. I moved my hip front and back rubbing my clit on his pelvis for a few minutes. After sometime I climaxed and he ejaculated inside me. It was very satisfying.

After that incident, every night after dinner, I waited for my Atthe to go to their bedroom. I waited for half an hour to let her go to sleep. Then, I took Mava to their bedroom. If he tried to hug me or kiss me, I took him to the guest bedroom and had sex with him. I couldn’t take him to our bedroom because my son had come back home from my parents’ house. He slept in our bedroom. The guest room was small but it was not bad. Sometimes when I wanted to have sex, I took Mava to the guest room, if Atthe had already gone to sleep. Even though Mava’s memory was bad, he surprised me by having sex with me as if he remembered. I used to usually lie down on my back and let him penetrate my vagina from top or I would let him lie down on his back, and sit on him with his penis in my vagina, so one day when he told me to kneel down, I got scared. I thought he must have got his memory back. But he still called me by my Atthe’s name. So, I knelt down on the bed. He knelt down behind me and penetrated my vagina from behind me. One day, when I was lying down on my back with my legs apart, waiting for him to penetrate me, he knelt between my legs, lifted my legs and kept my ankles on his shoulders, surprising me. He penetrated my vagina, kneeling down on the bed, with my legs on his shoulders. Not even my husband had penetrated me in that position. The penetration was deeper and his penis was hitting my G-spot.

There were five months left for my hubby to return from the US. During that time, I had sex with my Mava, once a week. By the time my hubby returned, my Mava’s memory had become so bad, he couldn’t even remember my Atthe’s name, Jaya. He didn’t call me Jaya anymore. He had stopped trying to touch me and kiss me. My hubby had sex with me every week, so I was very satisfied but I felt bad for my Mava. I worried he would not be sexually satisfied. I knew my Atthe was too week to have sex. So sometimes after my hubby left home, I would take Mava to the guest bedroom and have sex with him. I took care of him for two more years before he passed away due to a sudden heart attack.

Five years after he passed away, I still miss him sometimes, even though my hubby keeps me satisfied.